Of what I cannot be~

I saw the posts on Facebook.

Your children heading off for the new school year,
Comments about their last, first day of school.

The announcement of a new baby,
Mothers and Newborns tired from their hard work.

The constant photo updates,
Of Soccer Matches, Gymnastic Meets, Chess Club.

I am happy in your happiness.

But, I am also exhausted.

Constantly reminded,
That I couldn’t carry through.

Having to feign interest,
In something that I cannot achieve.

Asked to read your discussions,
Lacking common threads and experience.

I am rarely on Facebook.

Now you know why.

Facebook-Like


26 Comments on “Of what I cannot be~”

    • dievca says:

      No worries at all. I’m normally just fine, but every once in awhile I have had enough. Sometimes the Facebook afficiandos are oblivious to their information overload and cannot understand my lack of desire to lurk on Facebook.

      Like

  1. BoPeep says:

    I too have largely disappeared from my IRL FB, tired of reading how fantastic others lives are. I’m on as Peep and it’s a nice way to say “hey” to other WP bloggers and exchange info quickly about the lifestyle, etc. I don’t blame you dievca 🙂 it’s largely ego driven.

    Like

    • dievca says:

      I’m afraid that my post was about not being able to have children ~ and being reminded constantly of others’ greatest gift. But, FB does fall into the realm of ego, too. I was being a bit selfish, I guess. I have a tendency to go it alone sometimes – maybe in response of dealing with too many people during the day. But, as I say this – I realize that I very much enjoy my fellow WP bloggers. A different mindset than FB? XO

      Like

  2. esther says:

    i get to the point too where i hit overload on the constant whining, begging for money for causes, children/grandchildren, ad nauseum. i don’t fit in anywhere, and fb enhances the lonliness sometimes. xx

    Like

    • dievca says:

      I do understand. Facebook was originally developed for college aged kids to connect. Remember College? We were in and out of each other’s pockets. I don’t want to do that as an adult. It is fabulous to connect — but I treasure the pieces more when there are not so many of them in my face. XO

      Like

  3. Hey, Dievca, you’re not alone (but you already know that)! Anyway, just wanted to say that I share your sentiments, since I’m part of the same group… plus people who brag bore me stiff so, yeah, fb may not be the best place for us. xx

    Like

  4. hispetitelle says:

    Sending you love, sweetie. I deal with a similar feeling about FB, but not the same issue as you. It’s something Coach and I have had to struggle with for a long time. To so many it comes easy, but for us it never has, so when they proudly boast over and over and over I logout of FB and don’t log back in for a while. Usually I’m OK, but there are those days that really get to me.

    The WP family is so much more understanding 🙂

    Like

    • dievca says:

      Thanks, Elle. Some people are just more private and in our World of “everything in your face, all the time” — those people get lost (or looked down upon). “Why aren’t you posting every moment of the kid’s lives?” Uhh—because it might be too much and maybe my family would like a little privacy?
      Ahhh- it all comes out in the wash, I was just feeling blue because I will never say, “This is the last, first day of school for my Child.” (1st day of Senior Year).

      Like

      • hispetitelle says:

        I don’t like to post a daily journal of my family on FB mainly because I don’t want to answer a million questions. Some people are so intrusive.

        My heart goes out to you. I know you have your good days and your bad. Believe me, I have my personal issues that swing like that. I’m having one of those days today. We can hold each other’s hand.

        Like

      • dievca says:

        Thanks — a little touch goes a long way. 🙂

        Like

  5. ah the common bonds of humanity– we want what we cannot have, sometimes take for granted what we are given, we long for and ache with the knowing of what is missing. Kisses to you, dievca.

    Like

  6. mrmodigliani says:

    Thank you for sharing yourself so honestly with us dear dievca.

    Like

    • dievca says:

      You are very welcome This is NOT something I would post on FB. I think you can see why. Why kill someone’s joy with my brief moment of pain? I’ll get back to normal. XO

      Like

  7. Cinnamon says:

    This I understand so well. It’s hard isn’t it? I have to admit at times I even avoid family, just because it hurts. I’m happy for them, but it just hurts.
    XO

    Like

  8. ….As you know, I have the children..but I hate facebook…it makes life look perfect and it’s not the truth..I feel like it’s an extension of Stepford, where we think we have control, but we don’t. This much I know..you are special xxxxx

    Like

    • dievca says:

      I was just having a moment. Sometimes FB is information overload~ The beauty is that I don’t have to look, but then I get “Why aren’t you ever on Facebook?” Sigh.

      Like

  9. jackiemallon says:

    Sorry that you’re sad, D.
    If it helps I too am bothered by all the kiddie updates on FB. Relentless! My husband rightly put things in perspective when he said that “when some women sacrifice their own more “selfish” (heavy on the quotation mark finger symbol) interests, their children are their creations, their projects, their successes, what they’re working on…just like your writing.” Such wisdom.
    Sorry again and hope the sadness has passed.
    XO!

    Like

    • dievca says:

      Ahh, your husband makes an excellent point.
      I’m good, now. I really do love children – my family and others. Just every once in awhile, I wish they were mine and seeing the constant traffic flow of photos is relentless.
      Speaking of “projects” – I am in the midst of enjoying one of yours! XO

      Like

    • hispetitelle says:

      I just had to respond because you make a great point. I am so selective about what I post on FB about my kids because they aren’t projects, they’re people. It is a slippery slope when a child becomes a substitute for work or creative outlet or whatever else. One freaking soccer trophy or a lost tooth isn’t post worthy and those things happen millions of times over everyday. Many of these kids are growing up to think they are so very special and unique and they’re just not.

      Like

      • jackiemallon says:

        Hi there! I’m sure all your FB pals really appreciate your selectivity. 🙂

        It’s a tricky situation, I imagine. I would hope I would be discrete if I was a mother. Growing up, my mother never boasted about our achievements at school, exam results, acceptances into college. If someone asked specifically, she would say “Aw, she did okay, thankfully.” 🙂 So I may be conditioned to react against this modern idea of pushing a child into the spotlight for everything they do.

        Recently an old school pal who I haven’t seen in years, but a school reunion made her reach out to me on FB, has been making my skin itch with frustration with what she posts. She has a very pretty 12 or 13 year old girl. Every day there is a new photo of her wearing make up, hand on jutting hip, and striking a red carpet pose like a Kardashian and her mother just posts a heart or a smiley face with the photo.( Incidentally her mother strikes the same poses). I want to cry out how wrong/sick it seems to me. Stop photographing her posing like a child model and let her relax, get dirty, climb trees, and less photos! But so many other mothers click Like and comment on how pretty her daughter is. To me it’s screwed up and instilling terrible values in that little girl. Shouldn’t she know that?!
        Doesn’t someone else around her think to tell her..?
        Baffling to me.

        Like


Thoughts?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.