In honor of David Bowie and the ‘sometimes’ pain of CHANGES.

David Bowie, unknowingly, got me through the awkwardness of High School. I could listen, dream and grow without worrying what he thought of me. He was strange and strong.  I realized I could be strange and strong. I call upon him, again, as I consider making changes in my Life.

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Changes:

You stated there had to be change.
My Life is so fluid and dynamic, daily, I just looked at you in confusion.
I live and breathe change.
So make the changes.
No stranger to constant frenetic activity, I can stop and start on a dime.

Child-like, I thought if things were going to change between two logical people — the changes would be for the better and require all parties to give up something. 

So I stepped right up, in good faith, without missing a beat and found myself given less time, less attention, less quality experiences, less respect, less manners, less sharing, just less….but I kept giving of myself, then even more when I saw it was needed.

Finally, I asked, what did I get from these changes?
I seem to be left standing with almost nothing.
If I ask you, can you tell me what I gained?
There was something of value, in the past.
But it seems to have disappeared with the changes~

You know what? I really need to think on this…..

As David Bowie’s “Changes” plays in my head:


Oh, yeah
Mmm
Still don’t know what I was waitin’ for
And my time was runnin’ wild
A million dead-end streets and
Every time I thought I’d got it made
It seemed the taste was not so sweet
So I turned myself to face me
But I’ve never caught a glimpse of
How the others must see the faker
I’m much too fast to take that test
Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes
Turn and face the strange
Ch-ch-changes
Don’t want to be a richer man
Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes
Turn and face the strange
Ch-ch-changes
Just gonna have to be a different man
Time may change me
But I can’t trace time
Mmm, yeah I watch the ripples change their size
But never leave the stream
Of warm impermanence
So the days float through my eyes
But still the days seem the same
And these children that you spit on
As they try to change their worlds
Are immune to your consultations
They’re quite aware of what they’re goin’ through
Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes
Turn and face the strange
Ch-ch-changes
Don’t tell them to grow up and out of it
Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes
Turn and face the strange
Ch-ch-changes
Where’s your shame
You’ve left us up to our necks in it
Time may change me
But you can’t trace time
Strange fascination, fascinatin’
Ah, changes are takin’
The pace I’m goin’ through
Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes
Turn and face the strange
Ch-ch-changes
Oh, look out you rock ‘n’ rollers
Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes
Turn and face the strange
Ch-ch-changes
Pretty soon now you’re gonna get older
Time may change me
But I can’t trace time I said that time may change me
But I can’t trace time

Songwriters
DAVID BOWIE

Published by
Lyrics © BMG RIGHTS MANAGEMENT US, LLC , Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, TINTORETTO MUSIC

 

 


13 Comments on “In honor of David Bowie and the ‘sometimes’ pain of CHANGES.”

  1. Pelelotus says:

    Cannot believe he has died. Thought he would never pass away.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. esther says:

    it was so unexpected…but he was still himself all through to the end. fly free, david. xx 🚀

    Liked by 1 person

    • dievca says:

      I think he has been under-the-radar for awhile. I just hope he was able to move on in peace and with family (which I think happened). Good Memories will stay — I love this almost spoken word video. XO

      Like

  3. Universal givers…”So I stepped right up, in good faith, without missing a beat and found myself given less time, less attention, less quality experiences, less respect, less manners, less sharing, just less….but I kept giving of myself, then even more when I saw it was needed.”
    Over time, the endless “give” becomes our way until we are shaken awake and realize we don’t even have the words to ask for what we need because we have forgotten who we are and what we long for; we have gone missing.

    Liked by 1 person

    • dievca says:

      As I told Jackie — I have found myself to be wide-ranging in dealing with many types of surface people during the day, but more limited in the types of people I have chosen as close friends.

      I opened up to some different types of friends and have found we don’t play by the same rules. So, when I reacted in my normal way – it’s actually backfiring and I haven’t been quick or aware enough to change without being surprised.

      Honestly, it’s not their fault. They are behaving as they always have done so in the past. They don’t know how to be different, they don’t want to be different – I just have to make my decisions, my changes based upon a new awareness and I’m not sure which way I will go.

      I’m afraid the blog will be hosting some of my analysis as I work through the ch-ch-ch-changes. XO

      Liked by 2 people

    • Seeking Zen says:

      I have not been online since last year. Things have become more difficult and I’ve been lost in all my life’s ch-ch-changes. 😉 as i recall, I left around the time we were discussing Myers Briggs personality types and you said that you’re an ENTJ. I think the name of that type is “the fieldmatshall” because it is known for its decisiveness, independence, and leadership. Do those traits explain you in your life? Are they actually pretty much what define you? It just occured to me that for myself, as I’m feeling lost because of changes everyone else made, my personality type is like an anchor i can use because in reality, i feel lost because everyone else changed and as they changed, i turned myself into a pretzel, changing FOR them, to keep them (i lost them anyway).

      As an aside, by the way, i am an ENFP/J. The test measures our dominant traits, so the last set measures whether someone is Perceiving or Judging. Perceiving people are more free spirited, the stereotypical “creative,” while Judging people like schedules, structure, and a certain degree of reliability, the stereotypical CEO. (I break about even on P/J.) Combine that with temperaments — there are four, with two sets. One set is “NT” and “NF.” Their commonality is in their mode of thinking — these two temperaments are abstract thinkers, they like to focus on ideas, they are people with vision, seeing what could be, not what is. Do you see the construct? The online tests are accurate enough for you to get the correct type unless you’re one of those people who can’t answer the questions without direction (yes, there are people like that).

      Anyway, i wanted to write when i saw your post just to tell you I’m sorry something that was an outlet in so many ways is being, perhaps, “diluted” at times by the harshness of change. I’m sorry for that, D, but hope these are growing changes.

      I was, however, struck by what you wrote below. You said it’s not their fault because they are behaving as they always have and don’t know how to be or want to be different (from who they are or is “different” a euphemism for “change” or a little of both?).

      It seems this new advent in the relationship came about because either they are being different and have changed OR they are being the same and yet something has changed the quality of the relationship the two of you have. If it’s the latter — if they are being the same, yet their “sameness” has required you to change (perhaps your standards or definition of what you want from the relationship) — i’m guessing the problem is that their priorities have shifted. The changes you were forewarned about were, I’m guessing, a decision on their part that they were shifting priorities. Which, by the way, means they can change their life.

      I will say one other thing, people who can’t be and don’t want to be different from who they are — whose constancy does not promote stability — but who instead require everyone around them to change, tend to be rather narcissistic, meaning they value people for their purpose rather than for who they are. The relationships with people who add to our lives are with people who change and adapt to grow closer as time and the fluidity of life both inevitably increase.

      Sorry for this long note, but the first two paragraphs were catching up on an ongoing “conversation” we previously had. By the way, i wasn’t a psychologist, i was raised by one. I was a lawyer.

      And with that, happy New year! 😳

      Liked by 1 person

  4. jackiemallon says:

    I’m in mourning.
    Change is good as they say and being able to respond/adapt to change is admirable. But maybe you need to initiate some?
    XO

    Liked by 1 person

    • dievca says:

      How come I think David Bowie would appreciate an Irish Wake?
      Point taken about me initiating change and in process. David is helping and I’m working through it on the blog a bit. Bear with me…..in my narrow “midwesterness” I thought that if I give, I will always get —Why? because I have always been surrounded by a certain type of people who work, live, and love me and that’s how they respond to my giving. I expected a certain reaction to asking for change, but didn’t get it.
      There are more types of people in the World and they are not like me and mine.
      So be it, differences are what makes the World go ’round!

      Like


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