Customer Service – a rant (sorry)

poor-customer-experience-online-customer-serviceCustomer Service – a dievca’s unreasonable expectations….

dievca has been in PT for the past 2 months for her knee. It has been going well.  She has been “on time”, has not missed an appointment, has not rescheduled an appointment and does her prescribed work.

The Physical Therapist schedules out the Month and this month dievca’s appointments shifted from M and Th to M and F.  No problem.

dievca arrived yesterday did her session with the Physical Therapist then had to stop at the front desk because there was a problem with her credit card for the co-pay.   Throughout the 1.25 hours no one mentioned that they were canceling her scheduled Friday appointments.  She had a Voicemail to that effect that she received in the taxi after the session.  So, she called back in to determine what the problem was:

  • The Physical Therapist is no longer coming in on Fridays
  • The Thursday timeframe where dievca was normally scheduled is blocked out
  • The only open time is on Weds Noon which dievca cannot make
  • The scheduler made it seem like it was dievca’s fault she had to be put on a “waitlist”

dievca may be wrong but she feels:

  • These are things that should have been dealt with Face-to- Face. dievca was there at the office.
  • The larger schedule change (losing Fridays) should have started in October, not the middle of the current month.
  • If that couldn’t happen all appointments should have been rescheduled immediately when the changes occurred – not as a last minute reaction.
  • The customer (dievca) should not be made to feel that it was her fault that the schedule changed and then be told “well, you just have to go on the waitlist”.

Yes, dievca understands that schedules change. Yes, dievca understands that she is just another “number” and they obviously have enough “numbers’ to be flippant.

An “I’m Sorry” or an acknowledgement of poor scheduling would go a long way to making the irritation more palatable. If you expect your clients to show up and be on time, you have to be consistent in return.

dievca suspects this will bite them in the a** at some point because she cannot be the only person who is irritated and she is sure that this has happened a number of times.

You know – customer service is really important.

An aside: other places with terrible customer service Adidas, the RealReal and 1stDibs.  Places with GREAT CUSTOMER SERVICE – PayPal, Discover, Garnet Hill, MyTheresa


Feeling the End of Summer

Coffee sun and hair

End of Summer:
Long, curly hair with gold amongst the silver from the sun and chlorine.
Toasty brown skin moisturized via suntan lotion and aloe.
Give it a month or two and it will be back to a blown dry bob under a hat.
Fair skin refinished with retinol and heavier UV protection.

This is the first summer in years where dieca’s healing situation has allowed her to revert back to childhood behaviors of Sun, Swim, Play (PT) and Laziness. It’s been a gift she will treasure.

How was/is your Summer?


Running to the Doctor

Knee Dr.

So, do you think they can take an MRI of the Right and Left -Hips, Knees, and Ankles?

Up the Chain and Down the Chain?


Moving up a timeline – knee

back-tattoos-for-women-4During COVID, dievca had a three-month period where she was able to rehab her back.  Selfishly, it was one of the best things to happen to her regarding her health.  she didn’t/doesn’t want a relapse of COVID or another virus in any way, but it might give her time to work on her knee, she needs it.

Last week, dievca had scheduled appointments for two Orthopedic Doctors. to look at her knee – one appointment is this Thursday and one in June.   Her schedule blew up when her knee popped going up the 3rd flight of stairs from the Subway yesterday. she was stuck for a period of time trying to figure out how to get up the final 2 stairs. Finally, she slowly made it out of the subway and into a cab. The Cabbie got her to an UrgentCare and was super patient and kind – sometimes you gotta love NYC.

ligaments_kneeWhy an UrgentCare?  dievca knew x-rays were not needed immediately  – but she did need, crutches, large ace bandages, and confirmation of her injured areas.  The UrgentCare Doctor was great – the pop occurred at the ACL/PCL area – she (the Doctor) felt like there might be a cyst behind the ligaments. The area popped again (lightly) when the Dr. palpitated the area. Yes, there is chronic swelling at the meniscus (livable), the knee cap may have chips (that needs an x-ray – but not the main issue), etc. dievca knows the damage has been building for a while due to past foot/calf injuries + aging.

Anyways, dievca scheduled another group to look at the knee Monday 8am, to get “The Party” started.  she has the crutches and ace bandages — the pain has receded to certain positions and angles which gives her more information for the next set of Doctors.

The Uber home included a lovely, patient driver. Again, you’ve gotta love NYC.

If you are thinking – where was dievca’s Master?  He was the first call of the morning to talk about the Doctor who is scheduled for Thursday.  Then after the pop, He spoke with dievca in the cab and said he would come down immediately – but it wasn’t necessary when dievca knew He had family coming in town to stay.

dievca just wishes she could have made it to Thursday without the pain and loss of mobility.


female erogenous zones

sexy backBreaking down what partners might overlook.

One 2016 study found that the entire body had erogenous potential (happy news for Master and His dievca who love to touch). Note, there are frequent commonalities that are worth exploring.

One 2014 study found that the clitoris and the nipples are the most sensitive to both pressure and vibration (go figure). But, the areas found to be most sensitive to “light touch,” were the neck, forearm, and vaginal margin (the area just at the end of the vaginal opening and at the beginning of the perineum).

A study published in June 2020 used heat maps to show where men and women considered their erogenous zones, based on how aroused they became from appearance alone and then touch alone, as well as how the arousal changed whether they engaged in solo play or with a partner. Women consistently ranked the genital area, breasts, butt, and inner thighs high for touch, though the shoulders, hips, and the back of the neck were also shown consideration.

The study also examined what women consider to be men’s erogenous zones, and vice versa—and while most findings line up, it does show there are areas that might be missed for stimulation. Areas like the neck, inner thighs, and upper back, were ranked erogenous by women in the study, if slightly lower on the scale than the breasts, genitals, and butt.

According to a paper published in 2012, other areas include the mouth, ears, lower back, head and hair, and even—for some people behind the knee.

Maybe we should just take time with our partners and explore their whole bodies to determine their favorite erogenous zones – it won’t be time wasted~

Further Reading – links to related studies in order:

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-016-0745-z

https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/pdf/10.1111/jsm.12547

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-020-01756-1

Click to access Reports%20of%20intimate%20touch%20%20Erogenous%20zones%20and%20somatosensory%20cortical%20-%20Turnbull%20Erogenous%20Cortex%202013.pdf

A “Thank You” to Rebecca Decynzski from the Maudern


Game Changer – Something of Use

Theragun BlackuSWC3j10p7_therabody_theragun_mini_wellness_5_originaldievca has discussed various vibrators she and Master have purchased.  she is going to step away from the sexual and talk about a Recover Massage Tool for workouts and activities.  Her Physical Therapist bought her a Theragun Mini as a “Thank You” gift for allowing the PT to stay in her apartment as dievca traveled for three weeks.

Theragun Mini White

The Massager qualifies for the “Best Gift Ever” catagory: it offers amazing physical relief,  it is used everyday, and is easy to store/travel.  Trifecta!

Might be a good Holiday present for someone in your Life or YOURSELF!

WHY?

While it’s important to rest your muscles, massage guns can also provide relief by loosening you up and getting some blood flowing.

Massage guns work by pounding your muscles at rates of up to 4,000 times per minute. The depth of the stroke (called a percussion) and the amount of force it exerts determines how powerful it feels. Muscular people who prefer hard massages should look for a gun with a higher stroke rate, more percussions per minute, and more force, while sensitive folks should opt for a lighter-duty massager.

 


Self Care Sexy…

Sensual Self CareBody Exfoliated
Legs Waxed
Toenails Painted
Hair Cut
Skin Lubed

Feeling Divine~


Boobs

cosmo-howyourboobschangeovertime-infographic-1-1475183174

Your breasts grow and grow and grow during puberty, but by the time you’re between 18 and 20, breasts are usually “fully developed,” or finished growing. This doesn’t mean that the size of your breasts at age 18 are the size your breasts will be forever. Hormonal changes, weight loss, and weight gain can all have an effect on the size of your breasts.

After puberty and before pregnancy (if you become pregnant) is when your breasts are likely to appear the fullest. The two main things that give your breasts a shape and size are fat and fibrous connective tissue. After your breasts have finished developing your breasts are likely composed of more fibrous tissue than fatty tissue. Genetics have a hand in breast composition too. If your mom and grandma and grandma’s grandma all have very dense, fibrous breasts, you likely will too.

Gravity is a very real scientific force that no one on this planet can escape. Breasts can be heavy, gravity pulls down on heavy things, and this means your breasts may start showing gravity’s effects when you’re in your 40s. The second thing is that skin loses elasticity as it ages, so with the combined effect of gravity, it’s not unlikely that your breasts will sit lower on your chest. The third thing? Breasts get fattier, they’ll start to feel less dense in your 40s than they did when you were 23 or 33. They’ll look less full as a result, and the fullest part of them will sit lower on your chest.
Some women actually see an increase in breast size after menopause. That increase in size is caused by a few things: general weight gain all over the body, increased water retention, and a change in hormone levels. As with pre-menopause, breasts will be even less dense and composed of more fatty than fibrous tissue at this stage. This means the fullest part of your breasts will sit lower on your chest than it did before.

Even though most people’s breasts go through these same basic stages, you’d still be incredibly hard-pressed to find your exact booby twin roaming around in this world.

Maybe this tea towel will help!

All Shapes of Beauty Tea Towel $18 Uncommon Goods

All Shapes of Beauty Tea Towel $18 Uncommon Goods (click photo to purchase)

A Thank You to Cosmo Magazine, the New York Times and dievca’s Doctor.


The Spirit is willing, the Body – not so much.

Marie-Berthe Paquette, 102 years old, Montreal, 2016 Arianne Clément - GroundTruth

Marie-Berthe Paquette, 102 years old, Montreal, 2016. (Arianne Clément/GroundTruth)

Growing Old – Matthew Arnold

What is it to grow old?
Is it to lose the glory of the form,
The lustre of the eye?
Is it for beauty to forgo her wreath?
—Yes, but not this alone.

Is it to feel our strength—
Not our bloom only, but our strength—decay?
Is it to feel each limb
Grow stiffer, every function less exact,
Each nerve more loosely strung?

Yes, this, and more; but not
Ah, ’tis not what in youth we dreamed ’twould be!
’Tis not to have our life
Mellowed and softened as with sunset glow,
A golden day’s decline.

’Tis not to see the world
As from a height, with rapt prophetic eyes,
And heart profoundly stirred;
And weep, and feel the fullness of the past,
The years that are no more.

It is to spend long days
And not once feel that we were ever young;
It is to add, immured
In the hot prison of the present, month
To month with weary pain.

It is to suffer this,
And feel but half, and feebly, what we feel.
Deep in our hidden heart
Festers the dull remembrance of a change,
But no emotion—none.

It is—last stage of all—
When we are frozen up within, and quite
The phantom of ourselves,
To hear the world applaud the hollow ghost
Which blamed the living man.

Unlike the poem states – dievca still feels flashes of being young. she has hints and memories of free movement, but she wonders if this poem applies to her Mother’s age when memories dim and movement is slim. Note: that dievca is saying this as she is elevating and heating a knee which was painful upon awaking -trying to remember her name.

Photo above from an article on aging and beauty at the Ground Truth Project.


Anyone else trying to get Mid-Winter moving?

Hilda by Duane Bryers (1911-2012)


Something of use to fight~

  • HEEL DISCOMFORT

    The heel is the first bone to contact the ground when walking and takes the full force of impact and the resulting shock of bearing weight during motion, resulting sometimes in sore heel pain. General heel pain tends to dissipate overnight and can reappear or worsen during prolonged periods of walking or standing. The pain is commonly intense when getting out of bed or a chair but often lessens when walking – although that is more common in the case of Plantar Fasciitis.

With each step you take, your heel pounds the ground and puts tension on your plantar fascia. Heel cups — heel-shaped pads that go in your shoes — may help. They raise your heel to relieve tension and give you extra cushion. They often don’t work as well as inserts, but they’re a cheap option to try.

When dievca was hit by a car while biking, these heel cushions helped with the heel fracture recovery. dievca has also used them with plantar fasciitis.  They were useful with her calf tear and making certain shoes fit more properly to avoid Achilles microtears.

Note: dievca doesn’t use the heel cushions constantly. They come into play for relief of symptoms but are removed when pain and flexibility/loading are needed for healing and strengthening.


Back in the Day – Playsuits (reality check)

Back in the day, dievca might have chosen a romper (playsuit) like the images above.

Something cute to walk the beach. She hasn’t worn one since the 1980s.

Then she ran into this Loretta Caponi Anita Playsuit in white:

Cute and Sassy, right?

Then dievča saw this photo:

she’s rethinking the whole romper/playsuit idea with her age and current body shape…

What is your take on age/body and playsuits?


A pill to make it better~

As dievca sits here with a heating pad on her calves and ice on her knee…
wouldn’t it be lovely to just take a pill to make it better?
What is it?
Aging.

 

Judith Leiber Prescription Crystal Pillbox SAKS $795 (click photo)


It’s TMI – so no one tells you directly (something of use)

No one talks about peri-menopause. No one talks about colonoscopies.
For both topics, there are “hints” and “innuendo” – interspersed with potty humor (colonoscopy) or the suggestion of mental instability (perimenopause).

dievca is looking at both topics straight in the eye. One came to the attention of the other this week….

The colonoscopy prep is tedious. Here are some things of use to help one get through it:

  • Chill your prep solution as long as you can before drinking
  • Don’t sniff the prep solution
  • Don’t swish the solution in your mouth because you are pondering swallowing
  • Use a straw to keep the texture and salty and sweet taste away from your tongue
  • Take small to medium sips
  • Swallow as fast as you can to limit the taste in the mouth
  • Take a small sip of water/clear fluid to dilute and rinse the taste from your mouth
  • If you feel nauseous, take longer pauses between sips – even if you go beyond the time limit for drinking the prep
  • If you feel like you need something more substantial in your stomach than liquids, suck on hard clear candies, eat light-colored Jello, apple sauce, and Italian ice. No red or purple colors.
  • Keep a cream available for a sore bum
  • If everything coming out stays neon yellow – don’t panic. As long as its clear, you are ok.
  • Finish the prep as best you can, but know that if you throw some up – it is not a problem as long as emissions are clear
  • Your blood pressure is going to be high due to dehydration, don’t panic
  • Schedule the procedure in the morning, so you don’t have to wait if someone before you has a problem and you can get to your caffeine as soon as possible after the surgery.

For the Ladies:

Perimenopause?
When dievca checked in for the procedure – they insisted on her taking a pregnancy test (!)…..on the hint that she still gets periods. That’s where perimenopause rears its head.  How old are the people getting their 1st colonoscopy? In their 50’s – when does perimenopause start? late 40’s early 50’s on the average.  The question, “Do you still get your period?”, can be a loaded question and awkward to answer~ Be aware. It’s tough to pee in a cup when you are dehydrated.

The procedure itself is quite simple and your a** does not hang out for everyone to see.

A side note: A close friend’s sister died at 40 from colon cancer. dievca’s friend was constantly on people to get a colonoscopy ASAP. Sadly, that friend was the one who beat gallbladder cancer only to die from pancreatic cancer at 50. dievca finally honored her promise to her friend, she knows her friend was watching. All clear.

 


ergoErgo: Something of Use


Remember that dievca told you that her back will always be a work-in-progress?
Working from home was taking its toll.

Until the ergoErgo seat arrived at her doorstep. In ORANGE.
Active sitting has strengthened her core and worked on her back flexibility.

dievca’s back is moving pretty freely these days.

There are three sizes: Regular, Extra and Kids

How it works:

RIT design school article about the development of the ergoErgo chair.

Click here to purchase.


Reaping the benefits of a Quarantine

Have you gained anything positive from the Quarantine?

We know the bad news:
People have died. People have been very ill, lost jobs, been furloughed.
Businesses closed, economies collapsing.

Loneliness. Depression.

Has anything positive happened?
CO2 emissions dropped.
Wildlife came back to heavily used and populated spaces. One can hear the birds chirping at 4:30 am in NYC.
Some businesses which were on the verge of collapse received a reprieve with Federal Aid or were able to file for bankruptcy in a less messy manner.
In NYC, Animal Shelters had most of their animals adopted.
Some Family and Friends grew closer than they ever expected.

dievca’s body has been healing.
Yes, there are age issues and lurking injuries that won’t disappear, but their impact has lessened – immensely.
dievca has been able to assess, have the time to fix and strengthen her body.
The time in quarantine has been a godsend to dievca and she feels a bit guilty about it. Catholic guilt.

Well – with dievca’s healing – she’s dusted off her road bike and has started cycling Central Park with Master. 

Joyce Barry Australian Cyclist

dievca’s bike was in storage, but the other ‘bits and bobs’ had to be bought
(click photos for brands):

If you want to know why dievca bought certain items – just ask.


Feel the Heat – Something of Use

Kozi Neck Shoulder Wrap $50.95 – click for the original site.

Years ago, dievca picked up this Kōzi Neck & Shoulder Wrap in TJMaxx on clearance for $12. It sat in its box for a year or more until dievca realized that heat really helps her aches and pains.  Ever since that moment – its been in heavy rotation.

The wrap is handcrafted using natural herbs and grains to relieve stress, tension, cramps, and muscle discomfort. You can microwave (2 minutes) or freeze for instant therapy. dievca has ice packs, so she hasn’t frozen the wrap.

$50.95 + shipping seems to be a really high price for the wrap – so dievca found it elsewhere for a better price – if you are not choosy about color: Click here for chocolate, lavender or plum at $16.43 +shipping.

There are other shapes available, but this one hugs the neck and upper back nicely – then you can wrap it around a calf, knee /hamstring or sit on it for lower back or glute issues. dievca wouldn’t go for another shape. she doesn’t have the room for multiple pieces.

It’s been really great on text neck/computer neck. And a good option for Aftercare.

cryotherapy and thermotherapy

Ice is for injuries — calming down damaged superficial tissues that are inflamed, red, hot, and swollen. The inflammatory process is a healthy, normal, natural process that happens to be painful and more biologically stubborn than it needs to be. Icing is a drugless way of dulling the pain of inflammation and taking swelling down a bit. Examples of use: a freshly pulled muscle or a sprained ankle.

Heat is for muscles, chronic pain, and stress — taking the edge off symptoms like muscle aching and stiffness, which have many causes including overuse and arthritis. Chronic pain, especially back pain, often involves lots of tension, anxiety, hypervigilance, and central sensitization. Comfortable heat can soothe a jangled mind and nervous system.

Heat therapy is an effective remedy for back pain because it boosts circulation, which then allows nutrients and oxygen to travel to joints and muscles. This circulation helps repair damaged muscles, relieves inflammation, and improves back stiffness. Any type of heat therapy can help relieve back pain.

 

 


Fantasy VS. Reality


The Norma Kamali Sequin underwire top and bottoms are exclusive to Net-A-Porter and are something to dream about~ Can you see the suit poolside in Miami, FL?

dievca has a little over a month to work on her poolside presentation. The best full-body workout that will be easy on a torn hamstring/calf and back is swimming. Reality is that dievca will be wearing Stella McCartney for Adidas and Speedo. Let’s hope she can be disciplined for Master and her training.


Let’s talk about Sex, Baby – actually Arousal~

What is happening between your legs as well as between your ears during arousal?

Desire usually refers to emotionally wanting to have sex, while arousal refers to the physiological changes in your body that happen when you are sexually excited.

During arousal, your brain is welling up with powerful hormones: dopamine and oxytocin. Dopamine, which comes first, triggers feelings of motivation. I really want to get this person naked. Oxytocin, the ‘Cuddle Hormone’, kicks in later and makes you feel bonded with your partner.

As a pair, the two neurotransmitters explain why we feel instantly — if momentarily — bonded to our partner when we start to feel turned on. During arousal, certain geography of the brain lights up like fireworks. Half a dozen parts of the brain become activated, including the amygdala (associated with emotions), the hippocampus (associated with memory management), and the anterior insula (helps process physical feelings).

Men and women’s brains don’t always respond the same way to arousing stimuli. In a study published in 2015, men and women watched a series of erotic videos while researchers examined their brains using an fMRI. Both men and women reported feelings of arousal while watching the videos, but researchers noticed that men showed more brain activity in the amygdala while women showed hardly any.

More so than men, women tend to be aroused by stimuli that they can “imagine themselves into” — like an erotic story, or an imagined fantasy. Another study that tracked eye movement as people watched pornography, found that both men and women’s eyes were locked on the woman in the film — regardless of their sexual orientation. The theory? Women need to imagine their way “into” the scene, while men are satisfied by focusing on the visual imagery alone.

Researchers also noticed that women’s stimulation of the vagina, clitoris, and nipples all correspond to the same precise area of the sensory cortex — meaning that all of those areas register as erogenous. Yes, confirming the obvious, but arousal has been difficult to measure as there is often a disconnect between what is happening in your genitals, your brain, and your consciousness.

John Bancroft, Ph.D., senior researcher and former director of the Kinsey Institute, has studied how arousal develops, and his research pinpoints something important:

We need to be aware of our own arousal before we can really feel aroused.

Photo: Shutterstock B-D-S Piotr Marcinski

“In the male, sexual arousal is typically associated with some degree of penile erection. The man will become aware of this, and focus his attention on the idea of his penis being stimulated,” explains Dr. Bancroft. But, in women, the equivalent — the stiffening of the clitoris — isn’t nearly as noticeable, and “typically the woman is less aware of her genital response unless her genitals are touched.”

Cognitive components of arousal are especially important for women. Just like sensual touching can jumpstart arousal, so too can sensual thought. Reading erotica, watching pornography, fantasizing about an erotic scenario, or even just thinking about sex all trigger a response in the brain — which, in turn, contributes to feelings of arousal. The biggest sex organ in the body is the brain, talking with a lover in a loving, sexy way can cause a man to become erect, or a woman to become wet.

The mechanics of sexual arousal are well-known, but are there things that can take our arousal to the next level? There are all kinds of supposed ‘sexual aids’ in the form of herbs, supplements, and exercise methods that claim to improve libido. e.g. eating oysters, taking ginseng, using THC lube. No conclusive evidence has been found that these items do not work, but there is no good evidence that they do work either.

What is recommended and proven is communication. The sharing of one’s desires is a great arousal jump-starter. Working to shed inhibitions and opening yourself emotionally can help you get into the right headspace to feel turned on. Don’t think of ‘foreplay’  as something completed to get to a conclusive event (orgasm). Think ‘sex play’ — a menu of different activities to create pleasure between partners, sometimes with a formal conclusion, sometimes without.