A sense of release~

20210708_215600 When your body changes and you decide that half of the clothes you have kept on-hand are out of your realm of revisiting, it is depressing and frustrating. Add that one foot has grown a size because of breakage, so gorgeous shoes that no longer fit need to be weeded out.

You push yourself to rip through the closets and try-on EVERYTHING….

1st you sell to Buffalo Exchange and Crossroads (made $200) – the “better” load goes to The RealReal (photo of boxes for pick-up). High-end pieces to Vestiaire Collective or Decades. Leftovers and rags to Goodwill – and you find a place for those good condition bras at freethegirls.org. Who knows if they actually use the bras, but you are able to pack and send then out of your apartment – rather than looking at them in disgust because they are excellent quality and you cannot figure out what to do with them.

Release!

The closet now holds clothing you can wear IMMEDIATELY and pieces that you could wear in a pinch, shoes that don’t take 10 minutes to get on because of the foot issue.

And a few pieces you couldn’t let go of~

dievca has killed herself the past 10 days. 


Emotions, Feelings and Drama

e·mo·tion
əˈmōSH(ə)n
noun
plural noun: emotions
a natural instinctive state of mind deriving from one’s circumstances, mood, or relationships with others

feel·ing
ˈfēliNG
noun
plural noun: feelings
an emotional state or reaction.
“a feeling of joy”

dra·ma
ˈdrämə
noun
1. a play for theater, radio, or television.
2. an exciting, emotional, or unexpected series of events or set of circumstances.

Emotions can be measured by a body’s physical response to a situation. They tend to be predictable and well understood.

Feelings are a mental response to emotions. Feelings represent a personal reaction towards experienced emotions.

Drama is making your emotions/feelings someone else’s responsibility!

Thank you to the “Emotional Detective
and a conversation with Chris from the Muscleheaded Blog


Let me tell you my Mood

Wouldn’t it be great to be able to tell your Dominant’s or submissive’s mood without having to ask? They’re baaaack!

The mood ring is thought to be invented by Joshua Reynolds, a New York City marketing executive who is said to have first popularized the rings in 1975. He saw a friend use a thermotropic tape on a child’s forehead to take their temperature (Do you remember those?) and thought the liquid crystals could be used elsewhere.  Reynolds marketed the rings as “portable biofeedback aids,” and he was able to convince the era’s most popular department store, Bonwit Teller, to carry them as accessories.

In the 1970’s dievca had one of the cheap metal versions – did you? Bonwit’s offered a silver version for $45 and the gold went for $250.  The ‘stone’ of a mood ring was a hollow quartz or glass shell containing thermotropic liquid crystals. Modern mood jewelry is usually made from a flat strip of liquid crystals with a protective coating.

Believing in a mood ring is like believing in astrology.  Mood rings can’t tell your emotional state with any degree of accuracy, but the crystals are calibrated to have a pleasing blue or green color at the average person’s normal resting peripheral temperature of 82 F (28 C). The crystals respond to changes in temperature by twisting. The twisting changes their molecular structure, which alters the wavelengths of light which are absorbed or reflected. ‘Wavelengths of light’ is another way of saying ‘color’, so when the temperature of the liquid crystals changes, so does their color.

As peripheral body temperature increases, which it does in response to passion and happiness, the crystals twist to reflect blue. When you are excited or stressed out, blood flow is directed away from the skin and more toward the internal organs, cooling the fingers, causing the crystals to twist the other direction, to reflect more yellow. In cold weather, or if the ring was damaged, the stone would be dark gray or black and unresponsive.

The jewelry firm Leo Black in NYC has brought back the mood rings in 14K Gold or Rose Gold which means they won’t discolor like dievca’s 1970’s ring.   Ah, well — her crystal busted, too, so her ring stayed black…

The Leo Black versions may look like dievca’s ring, they are more expensive than the Bonwit Teller versions, but what do you expect in 40 years?

  • 15mm x 11mm
  • Band tapers to 2mm
  • Available in yellow and rose gold
  • $1150.00


Drama? What Drama? I had no idea….

Lucy-van-pelt-1-“Do you want to be honest, or do you want to win?
You could have it all if you could gracefully give in
Like when a martyr knows he’s a martyr
And looking in the mirror makes you cry harder
’bout your glittering ball and chain
In love, In love with your
Beautiful pain

Excuses and old theories repeat themselves and die
But when they don’t hold water
You try to keep them safe and dry”
– lyrics from the song Beautiful Pain by Rosanne Cash

 

dramaDrama: any situation or series of events having vivid, emotional, conflicting,or striking interest or results.

dievca always thought she was a “no drama” zone.  she feels deeply and is very direct/honest with her emotions – but not apt to make a scene.

A friend used the word “drama”multiple times relating to dievca.  dievca thought she was missing something in the definition and looked the word up. The direct definition didn’t seem to apply either.

So, dievca  googled Drama vs. Emotions and ran into this article:

Mind Body Green: Are you expressing your feelings or just creating drama?

Drama eCard

OMG — dievca was horrified, she has done this!
And it prompted her to write this e-mail:

I have never understood why you use the word Drama relating to me. No one has ever used the word for me.  I didn’t think I do drama.

I kept thinking that I just was telling you how I feel….

Apparently, not.

I was looking up the definition of Drama for a blog post and came across something about drama vs emotions, this article explained an important difference to me:

So how do you avoid drama while simply feeling your feelings? The easiest way is this:
When communicating an emotional experience to whomever you feel provoked by, say, “I feel _____.
 
But when saying it in a different way:
 
“You statements” = drama.
You made me feel _____!

The message in between the lines is:

You screwed up.

You did something I don’t like.

You’re wrong.

I am sure I have done this in the past, I cannot change that~

But the past two emails, where I replied to you – I did not do it.

So, if you are generous – I guess we should start there to go  forward.

I still feel a deep need to say I am sorry. I had no idea.

Update:
dievca’s sincere apology was accepted, plus she is doing well at using different verbiage to describe her feelings.
Whew!
 

Mirror

“You forget, My Dear, I’m an emotional mirror and I just reflect back at you.”

Richard-Avedon.-Mariyln-Monroe-1957

“It’s not me who is the emotional one, right now – it’s you.”

Photo: Marilyn Monroe, New York Richard Avedon 1957

Peace found…

20151229_072343_resized

 

Photo: dievca Midwest 12/2015

tempestuous

tempestuous

Characterized by strong and turbulent, conflicting emotions –

the weather and landscape are a reflection of me.

When the snows come,

I hope to find peace.

Photo: dievca Midwest 12/2015

I’m emotional – so sue me…

A recent study indicates that our emotions may actually serve us well in the bedroom. According to a study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine, emotions may actually be good for a woman’s sex life. The study found that women who have high emotional intelligence or are more in touch with their feelings and sensitive to others are two-and-a-half times as likely to orgasm compared to women who don’t have as high emotional intelligence.

mai khôi tự sướng orgasm

mai khôi tự sướng orgasm

“I am an excitable person who only understands life lyrically, musically, in whom feelings are much stronger as reason. I am so thirsty for the marvelous that only the marvelous has power over me. Anything I can not transform into something marvelous, I let go. Reality doesn’t impress me. I only believe in intoxication, in ecstasy, and when ordinary life shackles me, I escape, one way or another. No more walls.” Anais Nin

and I found partners with whom I had emotional fireworks with~

I spent time deciding whether a Sir deserved my honesty, trust, mind and body.
I hadn’t been treating my body like the temple it is.
I do now.
I praise her, listen to her, ravish her, am patient to hear and heed what she needs.
She’s the boss, and after having her mouth duct taped shut for so long she’s got a lot to say.
But, a good Sir pulls out the hidden gems and silences me with healthy Domination.
He is able to share, cherish and ride my emotions.
In return He receives the only true gift I have to give…
me-emotionally and physically-fully.

Burri, A., Cherkas, L., & Spector, T. (2009). Emotional Intelligence and Its Association with Orgasmic Frequency in Women Journal of Sexual Medicine DOI: 10.1111/j.1743-6109.2009.01297.x