Flying in, I hear that the anti-seizure drip kicked in – much better than having to make a breathing tube decision. Especially when your Dad emphatically stated “no tubes”…
I arrive and drive straight to the hospital. It’s 9:30 pm on a Saturday in the Midwest, the emergency room is almost empty and I have to wander through a labyrinth to find the Neuro ICU.
…arriving to someone who can open his eyes and someone who can’t get their words out, but knows where the toilet is and gets the message across clearly by sliding to the edge of the bed, then stands/walks (shuffles) with moderate+ help and does the bm business well in a semi-private mode. (my Dad will kill himself not to use a pan, apparently) Things are looking up!
It reminds me of M being sick and being so happy when he had a moment, too. It’s a basic action in Life that sets the tune for self-care in sickness and in health.
non-sexual gratification via scat
Now, as I look out on 6+ inches (15.2 cm) of new snow and drinking coffee, I’m devising a plan for getting my Mom “with it”.
Argh! I just realized it’s still snowing. OMG, my Dad still has my snowblower from when I lived in the Midwest. Time to ask for neighborly help with clearing the driveway.
dievca’s reference to “scat play” is something she and Master are not into – but BM’s are a part of our health and something dievca is learning to be fascinated with in regards to health….a fact of a healthy Life.
If you were curious about scat play in regards to BDSM, here’s information via Wiki:
Coprophilia (from Greek κόπρος, kópros—excrement and φιλία, philía—liking, fondness), also called scatophilia or scat (Greek: σκατά, skatá-feces),
is the paraphilia involving sexual arousal and pleasure from feces. In the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), published by the American Psychiatric Association, it is classified under 302.89 – Paraphilia NOS (Not Otherwise Specified) and has no diagnostic criteria other than a general statement about paraphilias that says “the diagnosis is made if the behavior, sexual urges, or fantasies cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning”. Furthermore, the DSM-IV-TR notes, “Fantasies, behaviors, or objects are paraphilic only when they lead to clinically significant distress or impairment (e.g. are obligatory, result in sexual dysfunction, require participation of non-consenting people, lead to legal complications, interfere with social relationships)”.
Although there may be no connection between coprophilia and sadomasochism (SM), the limited data on the former comes from studies of the latter. A study of 164 men in Finland from two SM clubs found that 18.2% had engaged in coprophilia; 3% as a sadist, 6.1% as a masochist, and 9.1% as both. 18% of heterosexuals and 17% of homosexuals in the study pool had tried coprophilia, showing no statistically significant difference between heterosexuals and homosexuals. In a separate article analyzing 12 men who engaged in bestiality, an additional analysis of an 11-man subgroup revealed that 6 had engaged in coprophilic behavior, compared with only 1 in the matched control group consisting of 12 SM-oriented males who did not engage in bestiality.
I am afraid that I am going to babble to you the next few days. It’s my way of pushing through and letting off steam. This release helps minimize my explosion of upset emotions about Dad. The meltdown will come, the good news is that you will probably be in India by then~
Airline ticket – check ($400)
Dial 7 – check ($29)
Rental Car – check ($97)
Maybe I was born in Missouri instead of Illinois~
I know I’ve said this, but I NEED to say it, again.
I have amazing friends. You included. I don’t feel alone.
Well, here we go.
He could live or he could die and I don’t have any control over the results.
Let me be calm and breathe.
This is why I kept going back so many times, I have nothing left to say – it has all been said.
My Dad knows I love him and I know he loves me.
But if he goes…I am going to miss him fiercely.
who else will give me hell and tell me that I am out of the will? d.
Eastern European tenacity.
The desire to work hard for the people you love.
My Parents, perhaps – like anyone’s Parents, have been a pain-in-the-ass. They have been a support system, they have been crotchety and stubborn, they have been….growing older and kicking / screaming the whole way.
Watching them hold each other up with age, after past years of challenges and successes, failures and re-boots — they have preserved.
And when I saw them grab for each other’s hand, I saw the love they have –
– which spilled on to me.
Lucky, I am, I know.
And honored to witness such beauty.
I share it with you because the more love you share – the more you get back.
(My Dad broke his neck– it stayed completely in-line…very lucky, Warfarin bleed out-staved off. He walked and took care of business, this morning. Simple pleasures. He’s busy worrying about my Mom and griping about the collar. Typical. All under control, to the best of our abilities. As my Mom says, “It’s hell to get old.” and we laugh. XO)
May you find someone to hold hands with when you need it the most. ~dievča
Photo: dievca - Midwest 2016